Words Worth Contemplating (Part II). Frontiers Friday #166 ⭕️
Words that stood the test of time, Part II.
FF166: Words Worth Contemplating (Part II)
"It is utterly false and cruelly arbitrary to put all the play and learning into childhood, all the work into middle age, and all the regrets into old age."
~ Maragaret Mead
Readers of the Frontiers will notice how much I emphasise the value of deliberate play."Don’t aim to have others like you; aim to have them respect you."
~ Kevin Kelly, from 99 Addition Bits of Unsolicited Advice
Not only do we need the courage to speak truthfully, and aim for others to respect you, we must also know who's respect is of value.“To forgive is to grieve—for what happened, for what didn’t happen—and to give up the need for a different past.”
~ Edith Eva Eger, from The Choice.
One of the common grounds many religious teachings hold is the practice of surrender. To forgive, is like a doorway to this practice.
When we work with people in our clinical practice, forgiveness and grief are common themes that will surface. Why? Because change is loss."The unexamined life is surely worth living, but is the unlived life worth examining?"
~ Adam Philips, British psychoanalyst, from Missing Out: In Praise of the Unlived Life.
Much more important to be engaged in living than thinking about it."Love people, use things. Not love things, use people."1
~ Richard Rohr, from The Art of Letting Go audio series.
This is salient to me as I roam around Singapore. Nearly everyone (including the elderly), is hooked on their mobile device, playing a game, watching C-drama, or scrolling some 20-sec video.
I was thinking: Would we end up loving the things that we hold all the time, at the expense of people we love? Would our values be thwarted, as philosopher C Thi Nyugen called, “Value Capture”?
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Main website is back up, but Frontiers of Psychotherapist Development (FPD, darylchow.com/frontiers) is still diseased. Apologies if you are experiencing some broken links at the moment.
Daryl Chow Ph.D. is the author of The First Kiss, co-author of Better Results, The Write to Recovery, Creating Impact, and the latest book The Field Guide to Better Results.
Similarily, Martin Buber said, “People were created to be loved. Things were created to be used. Most of our troubles come from the fact that we love things, and use people.”