Frontiers Friday #102. Sensitivity (Part II) ⭕
FF101: Sensitivity (Part II)
Last week, we introduced the topic of Highly Sensitive Persons, as well as the new blogpost on this topic called Pay Careful Attention To a Highly Sensitive Person's Inner Life
(In case you missed last week's missive, here it is .)
This week, we take a deeper dive into HSP... Plus, I have a new video/podcast series called Therapy Tips of The Week. I'm eager to hear what you think about it. Feel free to email me or put your comments in the video link below.
📽 New Video: Therapy Tip of the Week on 5 Basic Needs
I'm kicking off a new video series called Therapy Tip of the Week.
This was something I picked up early in my career. This idea of 5 Basic Needs was taken from William Glasser's Choice Theory, Reality Therapy.
Watch on youtube, or listen on podcast.
🎧 Listen: Psychology Podcast with Elaine Aron on HSP
I'm a huge fan of Scott Barry Kaufman's work on creativity and his challenges on the conventional wisdom on intelligence (more on this in future newsletters). He hosts a podcast aptly titled, The Psychology Podcast. And in this episode with the main researcher on HSP, Scott and Elaine goes into the weeds on this topic.
I particularly appreciate their discussion on the correlates of HSP and the Big 5 Personality.
In gist,HSP does not correlate with the Big 5
Openness to experience comes close,
Neuroticism did correlate but once you account from childhood negative experience, it is not significant.
📕 Read: The Highly Sensitive Child
This book is particularly useful for parents, teachers, and therapists working with younger kids.
The quiz is also insightful. (Available on hsperson.comwebsite).
This particular book really made me pause to contemplate about my older daughter, as I see some traits in her.
📕 Read: The Highly Sensitive Parent
I know, it sounds like overkill by now from all the references on HSP. I'm still reading this book in bits and drabs over time. Besides, I felt like I know enough about HSP after all the other previous materials. Yet, some of the stories from parents felt really validating.
Two weeks ago, we hosted a birthday party for my 5-year-old. It went really well. However, I took it for granted that I was feeling fine from trying to socialise with new parents I have yet to meet. What I didn't account for was how spent I felt after the party. I became irritable. Then I was upset at myself for being irritable, as we were supposed to be in celebratory spirit. Then I became hyper-sensitive to sounds. I needed to go into a vacuum to recharge, but I pushed myself. Not a good idea.Here's a snippet from The Highly Sensitive Parent,
If you need to go on playdates, the expectation when you have young children is that you chat with the other parent while the children play. You may need to do that sometimes, but when you don’t feel up to it, perhaps you can find an excuse to stay in your car.
We must face facts: First, you are easily overstimulated, and more so with all the extra social interaction at home and outside your home. Second, you, by nature, have strong emotional responses to social relationships. Yet third, you are not going to be able to or want to avoid the situations discussed below, so let’s see what might help.
On the flip side, I see this sensitive side of me as gift. It has helped me to be more attuned to my kids. I treasure this.
⏸ Words Worth Contemplating:
This excessive sensitiveness very often brings an enrichment of the personality. . . . Only, when difficult and unusual situations arise, the advantage frequently turns into a very great disadvantage, since calm consideration is then disturbed by untimely affects. Nothing could be more mistaken, though, than to regard this excessive sensitiveness as in itself a pathological character component. If that were really so, we should have to rate about one quarter of humanity as pathological.
~ Carl Jung, 1913.
Reflection:
Are there things in your past that has been called an annoyance but turned out to be your superpower later in life?
(For examples, watch this).
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